The problem with these emotions is that they usually manifest themselves during very stressful situations and with people you normally deal with. Friends, co-workers, loved ones and family. How do we deal with it? Is there any methodology that we should apply to asure us that we can either (1) prevent it from happening or (2) assure ourselves that we can resolve it instantly.
People have asked my how I manage conflicts; whether it may be in the workplace or at home. Here are my thoughts on them:
Workplace: In this environment, there are a lot of personalities you’d have to deal with. Some can be real open with their thoughts and emotions, some are very professional and there are a few who wear masks at work. The later type are in my opinion the hardest to deal with. They wear their masks to hide their true feelings, emotions and opinions. Usually, its these types who say things behind your back, both in a positive and negative manner. They can either praise you or stab you in the back amongst your friends and colleagues.
Home: You own personal paradise. But like the paradise described in the Bible, its not all fun and games. This place comes with rules, you deal with less people and they are much closer to your heart than anyone else and they are bound to hurt you more than the people you deal with at work. Peace and harmony in this place is very vital. Without that, you cant really find peace and call it a "HOME".
Now, how do we deal with it. There are a few things that come to mind on how to deal with hate, conflict and frustration. What Im going to post here is what I call "my feeble attemp" to find solutions to day-to-day problems. To put it simply, there are three (3) ways to help us: (1) CONVINCE, (2) CONCEDE and (3) COMPROMISE. All three have their pros and cons. Its up to us which method to use.
CONVINCE: This method attempts to show someone your point, hopefully a valid one. This is most effective if the other party is open-minded. Take note that, we should know when to keep pursuing this method and when to quit.
CONCEDE: This method is your other resort to the CONVINCE method. Its as if another person has CONVINCEd you that their points are more valid and you have agreed to it.
COMPROMISE: This method involves a lot of negotiations. Here it would seem that both are trying to be both CONVINCErs and CONCEEDers at the same time. This usually is the most ideal and most used method because most often, both parties agree and are content with the outcome of the negotiations.
Though I may have discussed on the topic briefly, one point that we should remember is that there is no single solution to any problem. We should try and practice all possible methods. They will eventually still lead you to your goals. Also, I think these methods are only for an open-minded person. Even if your a strong CONVINCEr, you wont win any battle or argument, because you stand to loose a friend or loved one.
See you all soon, take care.
- Sid
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